Formula 1, Basketball: What Next For The Imps?

July 26, 2024 Gary Lincoln City 0

The club released another merchandise clothing range yesterday, and it’s fair to say it’s dividing opinion.

I was only made aware of it as I awoke this morning to a Twitter message saying ‘fold the club now’. I don’t think that was a positive review, as it wasn’t followed with ‘and get Ralph Lauren on the line’.

Inspired by Formula 1 attire, the shirts are not unlike our Stacey West running shirts, only with a lot more advertising on them. They’re polo-style with a button collar, with flashes of red and white on the shoulders.

I don’t think they’re awful, but I couldn’t ever imagine a time where I’d want to wear one if I wasn’t working for the club. They feel like club attire, boosting the sponsors visibility and all that, but would you want to walk into the pub in it? I’m not so sure.

It’s not the first foray into different sports styles with the merchandise range. Earlier in the year, we launched a basketball top, again Imps-styled, with an eye on the US market.

Now, I could see that catching on -Eminem certainly made some American sportswear popular, and it’s not completely unusual to see basketball fashion in England – it’s certainly more acceptable (in my opinion) than becoming a walking advert, but that’s each to their own.

However, all this alternative sports stuff got me thinking – what if we wanted to launch another sport? Which former players might we get involved in the launch? For a bit of fun on Friday, here are my top five alternative sportswear ranges for the Imps and the people to model them (created using AI, apart from the badly used logos, which I obviously did).

Matt Rhead – Rugby

Rheady got in so many grapples it would make sense to see a rugby range. Rugby shirts might catch a few of those Lincolnshire Young Farmers as well. The image above might not quite capture the whole range: if we went all out, we might even decide to offer a Gillet (that’s a body warmer to you and me) and a pair of Imps-branded Barbour wellingtons.

Freddie Draper – Boxing Shorts

The way Fred has come back from the summer, I wonder if he’s been hitting the bags (no, not those bags). If that’s the case, perhaps it’s time for some Fred Draper boxing shorts? AI seems to think we might be able to squeeze some shoulder pads out as well, for those occasions where you might get sunburned boxing. Maybe? I dunno.

Liam Bridcutt – Swim Shorts

One for the ladies, right? A range of Liam Bridcutt swim shorts would surely sell well if he was modelling them, although I’m not about to use the image of him in the dressing room. I did ask AI to put him in budgie smugglers, but I suspect that would breach decency policy. Besides, I’m not sure any of us mere mortals could look good in a pair of Speedos endorsed by Mr 1% Body Fat himself.

Lee Beevers – Cricket

As we mentioned yesterday in our Chris Moyses final team article, Lee is a bit of a cricketer. I know a few of the Imps fanbase are into their cricket as well, so why not a nice selection of cricket whites for supporters?

They’d have to be white, obviously, but perhaps something with red trim might look nice on the village green in May.

Michael Bostwick – Hunting

You’re going to tell me hunting isn’t a sport, aren’t you? Whatever. I can just see Bozzy stalking deer in the woods in a stylish Oxen-branded hunting top and leather boots. The only thing to remember is there would be no gun – Michael Bostwick doesn’t need a gun. He’d catch the deer the usual way – a thundering slide tackle from nowhere.