As the World Cup gets underway, I’ve been trying to get into the spirit.
I’ve been doing my predictions on our Stacey West Patreon World Cup Predictions platform, I’ve been reading the guides and trying to watch the highlights. I don’t think any World Cup grabs you quite as hard as your first, but I’ll do my best.
There are a few too many matches, but that’s ‘progress’, I guess.
One way in which some have got into the mood is music. Three Lions, World in Motion, Vindaloo: they’re all singalong football songs designed to have you engaged. World in Motion is one of the best (in my opinion) as it blended to artists original style with an England angle. That’s what I like about a football song.
When an artist does a song, and it’s just for football, it feels a bit of a novelty. Three Lions is great, but would you listen to it in February? No, probably not, but World in Motion is a song that feels a little more timeless. Those are the songs I liked, and if I get asked to reel off my favourite football songs, you won’t find a novelty singalong with a shelf life of one month every two years on the list.
Instead, you’ll find these five bangers, all written about football, but all just better than the usual beer-filled singalong anthems.
Sultans of Ping – Give Him a Ball And a Yard Of Grass
‘Give Him a Ball and a Yard of Grass’ was an album track on the 1993 debut from the Sultans of Ping FC, who were always likely to have a song about football, given their name.
The song was written about Nottingham Forest forward and current Mansfield Town boss Nigel Clough. Unsurprisingly, it was inspired by a famous Brian Clough quote about John Robertson, with several other Clough sayings also worked into the lyrics.
Half Man Half Biscuit – Swerving The Checkatrade
I’m going to cheat here because I can’t pick from two Half Man Half Biscuit (HMHB) songs. Oddly, my first exposure to any football song came in the late eighties thanks to HMHB and Pat Nevin (honestly). I recall Pat Nevin doing an interview in Shoot: he was asked what he wanted for Christmas. He said a ‘Dukla Prague away kit’, homage to another HMHB song.
HMHB were formed in Birkenhead by Neil Crossley and Tranmere Rovers fan Nigel Blackwell. Blackwell had also edited a football fanzine, Left For Wakeley Gage, before the band came together and released their 1985 debut album Back in the DHSS, which topped the UK Indie Chart. They were quite unique (and still are), once they rejected the chance to appear on Channel 4’s ‘The Tube’ because it would have meant missing a Tranmere game.
It’s fair to say they’re not fans of the Checkatrade Trophy, and this has to be my favourite HMHB song.
Half Man Half Biscuit – Bob Wilson, Anchorman
I could have picked any number of HMHB songs to appear here. The Referee’s Alphabet is great, and there are many little references to football throughout their albums. This is satirical, and many won’t quite get it, but the band found Bob Wilson as Anchorman on Football Facous baffling.
They’re still recording, and if you’re interested, some of their biggest bangers include Horror Clowns are Dickheads, Knobheads on Quiz Shows, For What Is Chatteris… and Twenty Four Hour Garage People.
Don Farndon – Belfast Boy
I have no affinity towards George Best or Manchester United, but this song really landed with me. It appeared on a compilation, The Best Football Songs Ever, and it felt different.
Even today, I’ll stick it on for a listen, and it feels poignant given what happened in his career.
The Wakes – These Are Our Colours
The Wakes are another band with a couple of songs, and while I have picked These Are Our Colours, I couldn’t ignore The Pirates of the Leagues.
The Wakes are a folk rock band from Glasgow, which is the theme of this song: The Old Firm derby. Lots of their songs draw heavily on culture, heritage and place, covering themes such as anti-fascism, immigration, unemployment, uprising and rebellion in Scotland, Ireland and beyond, and this is no different.
The Wakes – The Pirates of the League
Released on the band’s own Big Hooley label, the album No Irish Need Apply continued The Wakes’ strong football connections. The album featured The Uncrowned King of Football, a charity single in memory of Glasgow Celtic legend Jimmy Johnstone, as well as Pirates of the League, a tribute to St Pauli first played by the band at Hamburg’s Knust venue.
I didn’t pick it, but it’s a close second in a strong catalogue of songs from the Wakes.
Lonely Tourist – The Ballad of Paul Tierney
Paul Tierney is Lonely Tourist, a Scottish singer/songwriter who played Lincoln a year or three ago. Another Paul Tierney played for Manchester United, a prominent youngster who saw his career fade away after breaking through in 1999. Odd I have picked two songs about Manchester United players.
I love this comparison between his career and Paul’s. Just a great observational song. Much better than Vindaloo.
Comments Welcome!